B was being discriminated against due to her disabilities for she struggled with ADHD and Epilepsy.
B- "We shall start with my work story because that is where I seemed to finally fall apart. I was so happy to finally be working as a call agent at 24/7 with Ulta being a phone receptionist. As I mentioned before at the end of June Missy, Saul, and Mama almost sabatoged my chances of even getting the job because they were trying me. They showed their true colors in how they felt towards me by not being cooperative with caring for the kid's while I worked."
B thought-
(She was left to fend for herself. Although she did push the kid's on Saul. B felt she had to in order to provide for them and get on her own two feet. Only, it was supposed to be a quick transition.)
Unfortunately, B's idea blew up in her face and a lot of people turned on her.
Once B got the job she took it and rolled with it. B did everything in her power to keep it. Even though it was a challenge every day, she still put up with all the bullshit that came along with the job and stuck to it.
The first incident was the training. There was a lot of material to remember, and B was barely passing the exams. She realized it would have been a lot easier for her to attain the information had she been on her Ritalin.
B: " Ritalin is a drug that I discovered 10 year's ago that helps me focus and manage my life better. It has been a never ending battle to attain this medication because it is a controlled substance, and a lot of psychiatrist are afraid to prescribe it to me because so many people abuse it, which sucks for me because I can't keep a job without it. I try to make due, but it is too challenging. I literally need this drug to maintain my life."
The company only hired B by default. Most of the people walked out of the training and gave up with the position because the job didn't pay enough to put up with the bullshit training at 6 am. When the program started there were at least 20 candidate's. Once the training was finished only 8 people remained. B was lucky enough to get shuffled through.
When B made it onto the floor she was having a hard time keeping up with the work load. She fell behind and was not able to note all her accounts properly. She kept getting written up for taking time out of her own breaks to stay on task. Finding little shortcuts here and there to catch up.
B felt the supervisors were setting her up for failure because she would go to her cubicle, and either the computer would be malfunctioning, or her headset would be missing. The floor supervisors were making snide remarks about her and pulling her off the floor to have meetings that would degrade her. It got to the point where B's health started deteriorating because she was not getting enough nourishment due to skipped breaks, and not getting an adequate amount of sleep due to stress. B felt like she had to overcompensate all the time just so she could keep her job, but put her needs to the wayside. Eventually she went and got a doctor's note so they would understand her health condition.
B: "I would just ignore them and do my work, but they made going to my job hell."
B tried to find ways to ask for accommodations in order to find relief for her learning disability. She sent a note to HR asking if it would be possible to have an assigned cubicle so she can log in and out of her computer without any trouble because she was not able to remember the 15 different passwords and all the employees were not allowed to have any paper or pens on the floor. The supervisors of course found a way to dismiss her request by making B the only one without an assigned cubicle; it was like a slap in the face. It seemed as if she couldn't catch a break no matter where she sat.
One day B was so happy because it seemed like one of the supervisors finally took the time to help her figure out an issue she was having. It finally seemed like someone in the department really cared for once, so she got excited hugged her and gave a little peck on the cheek, which in the Spanish culture showed a sign of gratitude.
Do you know the next day at work she was taken into HR and was written up for that? She couldn't understand and wanted to address it with the supervisor face to face, but they did not give her a chance to and demanded she go back to work.
B went back to her cubicle and tried to recollect her thoughts and felt she needed to explain herself to this woman that she must have offended. She asked her boss,
B- "Please if I may speak to this woman would it be inappropriate for me to apologize?"
B's boss explained to her,
"It is not the best time."
B told her, - "I feel I need some time to gather my thought's before I conduct my job."
She went to the bathroom and sat on the toilet crying and thought to herself.
(Never in my wildest dreams did I mean to sexually harass her. I was just trying to be kind.)
This really bothered B a lot, she started thinking.
(What is this world coming to if a person cannot even show gratitude? Well maybe I don't belong in such a world?)
At that moment B started hyperventilating wishing she was not in this world. Then her ears made a sound like a waterfall, and everything went completely black.
B felt herself in another dimension, and she was not sure where she was, it seemed as if she was in a highschool, but it was a different life. A better life that she wished she had, where people were generous and kind hearted. They made her feel loved and wanted........all of a sudden she woke up from this other life on the bathroom floor to the paramedics surrounding her, and a grotesque taste in her mouth which reminded her of taking a huge gulp of the ocean.
Later that evening B's neighbors sister came up to her and asked, "Are you alright?" She said, "I found you in the bathroom stall seizing and called 911. They couldn't get you out at first because the stall was locked, and we had to figure out a way to drag you out." She claims B was seizing off and on for a good 20 minutes.
B never did get to speak to the lady she hugged. She wished the woman could have found some empathy in her heart and treated her as a human being who had feelings.
The paramedics took B to Largo Med, and when they asked her who could come get her the first response was,
B- "My husband"
The people making the calls for her at the hospital told B that Saul was not willing, so B asked them to call Zane and luckily Zane came through for B. It seemed as though Zane was the only one person that cared. At least someone did.
When B was in the hospital lobby Mark Hannah, a news anchor, was on the TV blasting about all the cop killings.
B was thinking,
(Wow! How uncanny I used to go to school with that guy and here comes Zane another guy I went to school with. Then she recollected the dream she had slightly when she was unconscious. Are these just coincidences, or GOD are you trying to show me something?)
B- Mark you are the only person I have chosen to use their real name in this book so far. I really hope you get a chance to read this someday and give your input. Please have a heart and help an old friend figure out which platform I should display my work?
B had a day off from work, but the following day she showed up for her scheduled shift. She was told that she could take some time off if need be.
B mentioned to her boss, -
"I can't take any time off because I have two kid's to support and I can't afford to lose any time."
B continued to work her shift. As she sat there a muscle spasm began in her leg, probably due to the seizure the other day. B's body was showing signs of regression. She stood up from her chair to walk it off.
B's supervisor said,-
"What are you doing?"
B explained,-
"I am having muscle spasms in my leg. It is probably due to the seizure I had at work the other day."
The supervisor said, -
"If you're not in your seat taking calls then I am going to have to write you up."
B told her,- "You do what you have to do then."
Then B proceeded to take calls as she stood by her chair and stretched the ligament out. The next day B was terminated from her job for insubordination, even though she had a doctors note pertaining to her medical condition, and they were not willing to make any adaptations to work around her disability. Actually, they did just the opposite and made B's job that much harder for her to be productive. Like most of B's job's it was a miserable experience.
Now B has been trying to collect disability since 2012. She has been denied six times. She cannot seem to keep a job to save her life. She has been fired from 10 consecutive jobs now.
B- "Should I just give up and shoot myself now because I am finding it impossible to afford to live in this fucked up world?
It's not even worth it!
I hate gun's anyway.
I Just keep breathing and swimming.
I can't help the fact, that I feel like I am slowly drowning."
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