02/14/2012
On the day of our
wedding Saul and I were rushing down to the last minute. His family was
supposed to meet us at our home but they never showed. Later that day we heard
that their source of transportation had broken down but I believe Primo may
have had something to do with that.
Saul and I argued
the whole way to the ceremony. We even discussed turning the car around and
going back home and saying the hell with it. As we pulled up we couldn't find
parking, and I was shocked to see my Aunt Mary motioning me to hurry up. It
really meant a lot to me that she was there because everyone in my family was
not able to appear because it was kind of last minute and they lived so far
away.
Saul's family was
always close and I would envy him for that because no matter how big of an ass
he would be they always stood by him. So he was hurting at the moment because
his people were not present for this big day and surprisingly someone from my
side of the family came on top. I didn't have time to change into my white dress.
I actually said my vows in a pink dress with my belly already popping out for
show.
My little boy was
the ring bearer and best man. As Mary put the Vail on my head she told me
the story of how my Aunt Patty was the first person to wear this Vail on her
wedding day, then my mom, then my sister, and now me. I felt honored to be part
of this family heirloom tradition and even though these women could not be here
for this special occasion at least they could still be present in spirits. I
felt very grateful at that moment.
We headed down the
aisle with fifty other couples on Valentine's Day at the Botanical Gardens in
Clearwater Florida. As I was staring into my soon to be husbands eyes and
holding his hands tears started to flow as I said my vows, "Through
sickness and health till death do us part." Now looking back on that day I
believe those vows meant the world to me. Unfortunately, they meant nothing to
my husband. Actually, I believe now that the only reason why he married me is
so he didn't have to get stuck paying child support, because as soon after he
went and reported it to the State of Massachusetts and everything he paid out
over the years for when Pat and I lived without him he received in back taxes
and Pat and I never saw any of it. This man had a plan, and it wasn't to
love us, it was to screw us.
I wish I never married him because it was not worth the torture we
endured. He promised we would live a better life down in Florida, he promised
we would buy a home, he promised he would stop drinking and save that money to
build a better future with a new baby. I foolishly believed all his promises,
but none of this ever happened except for the baby.
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